


Hearts Ease

by AnonEhouse



Series: Conditions of the Heart [3]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Brainwashing, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Psychological Trauma, Recovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-12
Updated: 2012-04-21
Packaged: 2017-11-03 12:23:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/381304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonEhouse/pseuds/AnonEhouse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve does his best to patch broken Tony together, with the help of friends. Along the way, the Avengers Assemble.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It's done! YAY.

(If you are reading this on any PAY site this is a STOLEN WORK, the author has NOT Given Permission for it to be here. If you're paying to read it, you're being cheated too because you can read it on Archiveofourown for FREE.)

_Good morning. It's 9:00 a.m. The weather in Malibu is fifty-four degrees and sunny with a ten percent chance of precipitation. The surf conditions are workable with knee-to-waist-high lines, but with some long lulls. High tide will be at 12:38 p.m._

Steve woke up and looked around the room before remembering that Tony's house had a voice. "Nine a.m.? Wow, I haven't slept that late since... I don't remember how long." Tony was lying pressed against his side, warm back tight against Steve's belly. It was ... nice. His arm was draped over Tony with his hand at a convenient angle to stroke Tony's stomach, so he did.

 _Jarvis._ It's good to hear Jarvis's voice. Funny though, to hear Jarvis give the morning after wake-up call. Tony was hardly ever there for that. So much easier to hide in the garage until they give up and go away. But...now he belongs to Steve and he can't hide. Doesn't want to hide. Steve will protect him. Steve is touching him now, gentle, lazy strokes over his stomach, up to his chest and then lying flat over the arc reactor. Tony holds his breath a moment, but it's good. Steve doesn't press on it, just... covers it so Tony can feel the warmth of his hand around the edges, where Tony's chest meets the reactor. No one can take it when Steve's hand is there. He's safe. He touches Steve's arm, rubbing little circles on it. "Jarvis usually has a seven a.m. wake-up call." Steve won't mind Tony speaking without permission. He's pretty sure Steve won't mind.

"I guess he thought you could use the rest." Steve brought his hand up to stroke Tony's hair. "You could also use a haircut." Steve pushed Tony's hair out of the way so he could kiss the back of his neck. "And a few good meals."

Tony feels warm all over, not just where Steve is touching him. Steve is looking after him. He turns over to smile into Steve's eyes. They are as clear and kind and blue today as he remembers. "Good morning. I'm very glad you're here." He kisses Steve softly, watching to see if this is right. Steve might not like to have sex before breakfast, although it certainly seems he's ready for it. "Very, very glad. Are you glad I'm here?" Tony moves against Steve, and is pleased by how quickly his body responds. He doesn't have to pretend to be thinking about someone else, somewhere else, sometime else.

Steve smiled and rolled them over with Steve coming to rest on top. Last night he'd discovered how much Tony liked being blanketed by him. "I'm very glad." Steve kissed Tony and lowered himself so he could rub his dick against Tony's, while keeping most of his weight on his elbows and knees. It was an awkward position, requiring concentration and a fair amount of physical effort to maintain. That was all to the good. Tony was fragile in too many ways for Steve to lose his self-control.

"Fuck me?" Tony wants that. He wants to feel Steve inside of him, making every part of Tony his, making it all new and good. Making it clean and joy, not pain and fear.

Steve groaned and shivered. The naked need in Tony's voice nearly undid him. "Not... not yet. I've never... and I won't hurt you." Steve's not sure whether or not he wished that he had done it with someone else. Then he'd know how. But that always felt to him too important, too intimate, to give to someone unless he was committing himself to them. He rubbed against Tony a little harder, feeling the coolness of the chest piece warming, feeling Tony's dick sliding against him, slick then catching, then slick again. "Won't hurt you." He kissed Tony again.

Tony moans and wraps his arms and legs around Steve. "I'll show you. Tell you. You won't hurt me."

"Later. I promise." Steve kissed Tony and whispered in his ear, breath warm and tickling. "You can tell me everything you like. I want you to. I want to do everything that makes you feel good."

Tony gasps and comes, and he's not afraid, not afraid at all even though he's come without permission and he's come before Steve has had his pleasure. Steve is smiling down at him, then Steve closes his eyes and groans, pushes a few more times and there it is, hot and wet splashing against his belly. So good. He smells like Steve. Smells like he belongs to Steve. He dozes off again, while Steve murmurs in his ear how good it was, how sweet Tony is, how much Steve loves him.

***

Steve held Tony in his arms for a few minutes longer waiting for his sleep to deepen, then he got up and brought another blanket. Tony always felt a little cold to him. He was too thin. He was... too breakable. Steve was scared that he'd do something wrong. But there wasn't anyone else for Tony, so Steve was just going to have to step up to the plate. He tucked the blanket lightly around Tony and went for a shower. When he got out there was a set of new clothes in his size lying on the dresser, and a note lying on top. 'Coffee is on.' It was signed 'Pepper.'  
Steve dressed and left the bedroom. He paused just outside and said quietly, "Jarvis? If Tony wakes before I get back, tell him I'm in the kitchen." 

Jarvis answered just as quietly, "Very well, Captain Rogers."

"Good morning, Steve," Pepper said when he entered the kitchen. She smiled. "Sleep well?"

Steve felt himself blushing. He hadn't thought about it last night, but he and Tony had been rather noisy. "Ah. Yes." He took the mug of coffee she held out to him and sat at the table. 

"Thank you."

She sat across from him. "How is he?"

Steve put the mug down and frowned into it. "A little better." He sighed. "Really, about the same. No miracle overnight cure. He kept waking up- never said anything, but you know..." Steve shrugged. "Maybe we should get someone for him to talk to? I mean... a professional?"

Pepper shook her head decisively. "Word would get out. It would destroy Stark Industries, which is already pretty shaky. And before you say my priorities are messed up, you have to think what that would do to Tony. And I really can't see it helping. From what I've seen so far, Tony is only saying what he thinks we... you... want to hear. You could order him to talk to a psychiatrist, but..."

"Yeah." Steve picked up the mug and turned it around in his hands. Then he took a deep breath. "Ok, so, what do you have in mind?"

"We've got to get Tony in shape to handle at least one press conference. I'll hand-pick the reporters, control the questions, but he's got to look...confident."

"That's... you know he can't do it."

"We can put it off for maybe a week. There's a board of directors meeting coming up, and I don't have any power to stop them if they decide to lock Tony out. They already had the idea put in their heads by Stane after Afghanistan. Iron Man, and the promise of new tech from Tony, made them hold off, but their patience has run out."

"A week. Have you _looked_ at him?"

"The barber and tailor are en route. Tony knows how important this is. If we all support him, I think we can do it. If not... well...Tony has assets he can sell, he won't be kicked out on the street. But he won't be able to support his inventions. And he lives for them."

Steve was silent for several minutes, thinking. "All right. I'm going to call Clint and Natasha. They can help, I'm sure."

"Will Fury let them? After all, they work for SHIELD."

"He'll let them." Steve didn't bother to say that Fury would lose Captain America if he didn't.

***

Tony wakes up alone, but before it really sinks in Jarvis tells him that Steve is in the kitchen. Tony sits up and thinks about it. That's not an order, but maybe it's a hint? Tony should meet him in the kitchen. But first he should use the bathroom, shower and dress. Steve wants him to get better, to do things on his own, so Steve won't be angry. It's still difficult getting out of bed and doing things without permission, but the thought that it will please Steve helps him get through it. After he finishes in the bathroom he stares at the clothes in his wardrobe. Business suit? Workshop clothes? Lounging robe? He doesn't know what Steve wants him to do. He stands there for a long time, and then he feels his face getting wet. He can't... he can't decide. He falls to his knees and crawls inside the closet, into the dimness and curls up to cry. He can't. Steve wants him to do this, and he can't.

_Captain Rogers, I believe Mr. Stark requires your assistance._

Steve dropped his phone onto the table, cutting Clint off in mid-protest, and ran upstairs. "Tony? TONY! Where are you, are you all..." He saw Tony's foot sticking out of the open closet door. "Tony!" Steve reached into the closet and pulled Tony out. "What's wrong?" He looked Tony all over, but didn't see any new injuries.

"I tried, Steve. I really did." Tony cries so hard his throat is closing up on the words. He's so bad. He can't do it. 

Steve picked him up and carried him to the bed. "What did you try to do, Tony?" Steve held Tony on his lap and put his arms around him. "You got up and showered and shaved without me telling you to do it. That was very good." He rubbed Tony's back. 

"Was it?" Tony turns his face towards Steve, hoping.

"Yes, it was very good. Don't be upset, Tony. I know you're trying. It will be all right. Look, you go wash your face, and I'll get some clothes for you." Tony had stopped crying, so Steve got him on his feet and gave him a nudge in the direction of the bathroom. "Then we'll go down for breakfast. Do you like french toast? Or would you rather have bacon and eggs?"

Tony stands there, trying to think what he likes. He's not sure. But... something sweet sounds good. "French toast?" he asks, hesitantly, ready to say bacon and eggs if Steve doesn't like that answer.

Steve smiled at him. "Sure, you can have french toast."

***

"Right. You look good," Pepper said after smoothing the shoulders of Steve's black jacket. She handed him a shoulder holster with a gun already in it. "Now put this on under the coat."

"I don't use a gun, Ms. Potts."

"Call me Pepper when we're not in public." Pepper looked over at Tony who was sitting on the couch, not doing _anything_. "The only way you're going to be able to stick close to Tony constantly without arousing suspicion is in the role of bodyguard. Tony used to have four of them when he went out in public anywhere that wasn't secure. He stopped using them after he built the suit, but now...no one is going to question you being there."

"Yes, I can do that, but I don't need a gun." Steve looked at Tony. He didn't want to frighten Tony.

"You do. You don't have to use it, but if you don't have it, people will start wondering why." Pepper kept holding out the holster until Steve took it.

Steve went over to Tony and knelt beside the couch. "Tony. Can you tell me what you think about me having a gun?"

"Good." Tony looks at the holstered gun and at Steve. It's not difficult to say this even though he's pretty sure it's not what Steve wants to hear, because it's what Steve _needs_ to hear. "You can't bring your shield with you. If... if someone tries to take me... I've never been afraid of guns, Steve. Only of guns in the wrong hands." Tony is trembling. He knows he has to say it. He needs Steve to be able to protect him.

"Can you touch it, Tony?"

Tony nods. He pulls the gun out of the holster, turns his arm and shoots out the window overlooking the pool in one smooth motion. Glass shatters. "See, I can..." Tony looks at Steve's shocked face and carefully puts the gun on the floor. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please." He covers his chest with both arms and bends over, shaking.

"No, no, Tony, that was all right." Steve pushed the gun aside with his foot and sat on the couch next to Tony. "I'm glad you can use a gun if you have to, to defend yourself. If I'm not able to protect you, I want you to do whatever you have to do to save yourself. That's what I want you to do. I'll have the gun on me, and if you need it, you can get it and use it. That's what I want." Long before Stane, Tony had been a target for kidnappers, of course he had. He's wealthy, and he's high-profile, and instantly recognizable, and he doesn't live like a recluse, although Steve suspected Pepper vetted the host and guest list of every party, charity event, and meeting Tony attended. Probably with bodyguards in tow.

Tony relaxes. "I was a good boy?"

"Yes, you were very good. You don't have to shoot anything else to prove it to me, though." Steve smiled and patted Tony on the back.

"I'll get the window replaced in a few hours," Pepper said as she opened her phone.

"Are you sure the glazier has such a large, custom-shaped, pane in stock?" Steve asked.

Pepper shrugged. "This isn't the first time Mr. Stark has done a little instant remodeling. Why don't you ask Happy to take you and Tony for a drive? Get a little fresh air."

Steve could take a hint. He picked up the gun, took off his jacket and made himself into a bodyguard, complete with mirrored sunglasses. He felt a bit silly, but no worse than the first time he'd put on the Captain America costume. "Come on, Tony." Steve ruffled Tony's hair. "I like your haircut."

Tony grins and gets up. "I clean up pretty."

"Yeah, you do." Steve put an arm around Tony's shoulders and took him to the garage. "When we come back, you can tell me about your cars. And the motorcycles."

"You like motorcycles? I can buy you motorcycles. Oh, oh, I can _build_ you motorcycles." Tony is happy. Steve says he's good.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is still trying to figure out how to help Tony.

"Where to, Mr. Stark?" Happy asked once they were in the limo.

Tony looks at Steve. He doesn't care where he goes, so long as Steve is with him.

Steve said, "Just drive us around for a while. We'll look at the scenery, maybe have lunch out later? Would you like that, Tony?" He put his arm around Tony as Happy rolled up the privacy barrier and started the car moving out of the garage. "Tell me, do you know what would you like for lunch?"

Tony nods. He used to think about it, back when... when he didn't know what he was eating, when he didn't know if he'd be allowed to eat at all. "I'd like an In-n-Out double cheeseburger."

Steve grinned. Tony hadn't hesitated to answer this time. "That sounds great to me, too. Do you like milkshakes?" Steve wanted to see Tony put on some weight. He'd only been able to eat one piece of french toast before he started to look uncomfortable. Steve had taken it away before Tony could force himself to finish the rest of it. He had to keep reminding himself that Tony would do _anything_ to please him, and not care about the consequences. "If you don't like them, that's fine, you can have something else. I just need to know what you like, Tony."

Tony nods. Steve wants to take care of him, and he needs to know things. "I like chocolate milkshakes. I like strawberries. I like silk sheets and anal penetration."

Steve coughed. "Oh. Well. That's good to know." Steve blushed hotly. To hide it, he kissed Tony. "You can tell me anything, Tony. Only, don't tell me personal, private things where anyone else can hear."

"No one can hear us now." Tony grins. "I like sex. A lot." And because it's Steve, Tony tells him things he wouldn't tell anyone else. "I like it when my sex partner takes over and pushes me around. I don't like to be really hurt, though." Tony is fairly sure these are useful things for Steve to know. He wants Steve to fuck him, and not be upset about it afterward.

Steve rubbed Tony's back. "Do you remember, did you always like that?"

"Yes. It didn't happen that often because... you know, if word got out, it'd be bad for business. People think if you like to be pushed around in the bedroom, you can be pushed around in the boardroom. So I never asked for it, never told anyone I really liked it." Tony snuggles against Steve. "I like my company, Steve. I like Pepper and Happy. I like my cars and robots and Jarvis. I love inventing things."

"That's good, that's all good." Steve kissed Tony again. "We're going to work together so you can keep your company, Tony. You're going to have to talk to other people the way you're talking to me, now."

"What if I'm bad?" Tony presses closer to Steve, suddenly frightened again. "What if I... what if they see I'm broken... what if they take the company away from me?"

Steve hugged Tony tightly. "You're never bad. If someone steals your company... I'll get it back for you." Pepper would know how to fight, and Steve would figure out a way. "But we won't have to worry about that. It's going to be fine."

***

Tony looks into the restaurant and swallows. It's so strange. He remembers. Remembers going through the drive-through and flirting with the clerks. He also remembers walking in, grinning at the servers, telling them what he wanted. It had been so easy. He remembers not caring what anyone thought. It only mattered what he wanted. He had been a very bad boy, hadn't cared about others. He'd hurt Pepper and Rhodey and everyone who knew him because he'd been a selfish, bad boy. He doesn't want to be bad.

"Tony? Are you all right?" Tony had been talking and seemed to be looking forward to going out for lunch, but suddenly he was silent and looked miserable. "What's wrong? You have to tell me when you're unhappy, so I can make things better."

"I... I don't...I don't want to talk to them, tell them what I want. I thought I did. I'm sorry." Tony is disappointing Steve, he knows it. But if he does what he wants, he's bad. But if he doesn't do what he wants, then he's not 'getting better' and that's bad, too. Tony turns and presses his face against Steve's chest, so he won't see the restaurant, won't be tempted to be bad. Steve puts his arms around him.

"You're allowed to change your mind, Tony." Steve knocked on the privacy barrier. Happy rolled it down. "Mr. Hogan, would you please go in and get lunch for all of us? Tony and I want double cheeseburgers, fries, and chocolate shakes. And after that, find us somewhere pleasant to eat. Perhaps a park?"

"There's a scenic point nearby. Wouldn't take more than a few minutes to get there," Happy offered.

"That sounds fine," Steve said.

***

The living room was restored to normal when they returned from lunch. Pepper was sitting at the table doing something on her computer. She looked up and smiled at them. "Clint and Natasha will be here in two hours. We're going to work up a list of questions for the press conference." 

Steve had his arm around Tony's shoulders, and he could feel the sudden tension. "That's good. Tony promised to show me his cars. We're going to be in the garage if you need us." Steve got Tony headed towards the garage, before he looked over his shoulder at Pepper. She didn't look pleased, but made no objection. Steve had decided that he had to find something that didn't threaten Tony, so he could relax at least some of the time. So far, it looked as if everything had the potential to trigger stress reactions. 

Clint and Natasha. Tony remembers them vaguely. They helped save him, and more importantly, they belong to Steve. Tony is going to have to convince them that he's not too broken to belong to Steve's team. Dummy whirs up to them as they enter the garage, cheeping and waving a polishing cloth. Tony smiles. "Hello, Dummy."

"Does he understand you?" Steve felt the relaxation in Tony's muscle the moment they entered the garage. Obviously this place had good associations. 

"In a way. I developed Dummy and Butterfingers as an exercise in self-learning systems when I was seventeen." 

"Seventeen? You were building robots at seventeen. Ok, now I know you're smart." Steve grinned at Tony. "Did you always like machines?"

"Oh, yes. If I hadn't been Howard Stark's son, I'd probably be an auto mechanic. Hopefully not at Jiffy Lube, but still..." Tony runs his hand over the nearest motorcycle. "This is standard Type 6 'Samurai Chopper' from a custom builder, Zero Engineering. They only make twenty-four of them a year. Isn't it a beauty?"

"It's gorgeous." Steve didn't know what to make of Tony's remark about his father, but decided not to ask about it now. For once Tony seemed not to be weighing all his words for approval and he didn't want to spoil that.

"And this is my baby." Tony moves away from Steve a few steps without realizing it. When he catches himself he looks back at Steve and points to the car with the flames painted on its side. "Dad let me help with her restoration. She's a 1932 Ford Flathead Roadster. Not a particularly expensive car, but she's got style."

And good memories, Steve thought. He didn't move to join Tony, but pointed at another car, a little further away. "And that one?"

"A Saleen S7. It can do zero to sixty in three seconds- top speed more than two hundred miles per hour." Tony moves to the Saleen to pat the hood. "A fun ride. The one next to it is a prototype Tesla Roadster, all electric, all torque, all the time; body by Lotus and an absolutely silent engine no matter how fast you go. I call it my Stealth-mobile." He points to the last car in the garage. "Audi R8, my everyday car. Top speed is only a hundred and eighty seven, but I like the handling. The rest of my cars, including the Rolls, are housed in other garages. I don't like clutter."

Steve decided not to ask how much money Tony had spent on cars. "What's under the dust cloth?"

"That once was a 1965 Kirkham Cobra. I landed on it." Tony sighs. It had been such a nice car.

"Landed on it?" Steve went over to the car and tugged off the cloth to reveal a sadly bent and crumpled blue car with white stripes on the hood. "Wow."

"I was in the Iron Man suit at the time. Fell through the roof. And the piano. And the ceiling." Tony turns as Dummy picks up a fire extinguisher and rolls toward him. "Ah ah ah!"

"What's Dummy trying to do?" Steve was amused as the robot kept waving the fire extinguisher.

"Conditioned response. I had Dummy on fire safety while I tested the suit. Every time I fell on my ass, Dummy doused me. It happened so often it went into permanent memory. Now every time he hits an association trigger for that, well, he responds the way he learned." Tony moves warily to get behind Steve. "Look, Dummy, I'm safe."

Steve looked at the robot and had a thought. "Can you get rid of a conditioned response?"

Tony tilts his head and looks at Steve. "Yes. The process of unlearning a conditioned stimulus is called 'Extinction'. That occurs with the absence of the originally meaningful stimulus. In time, the conditioned response weakens. Plotting the number of times a conditioned response occurs in that absence produces a half hyperbola. However, while learning a conditioned response is relatively quick, unlearning is slow. The conditioned response will exhibit spontaneous recovery despite the continued absence of the conditioned stimulus after a period of rest. If you continue to plot following extinction, spontaneous recovery is a smaller half-hyperbola after a period of no response. Spontaneous recovery does die out, and the negative hyperbola gets even smaller in time." Tony looks hopefully at Steve. Steve wants to know things like this, doesn't he?

Steve blinked and sorted out the pertinent information from the word-babble into something that made sense to him. "So... it's easy to learn a habit and hard to break it."

"Yes." Tony is pretty sure he's pleased Steve.

"But if you're patient, you can unlearn anything you've been conditioned to do?"

Tony nods. 

Steve came to Tony and put his arms around him. "I'm very patient, Tony."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Small progress, small setbacks. But they will continue to try.

Tony sighs and leans against Steve. "If I wasn't broken, would you still stay with me?"

"Yes." Steve hadn't planned on this, but then he hadn't planned on a lot of things in his life. That didn't mean he couldn't recognize it when something was right, something he should hold onto with all his strength. " _When_ you're stronger, you can tell me to go, if you want. But that's the only way I'll leave you."

"I'm a genius. Why would I ever do such a stupid thing?" Tony grins up at Steve.

"You seem better here. Is that just my imagination?"

Tony shakes his head. "No, you're right. It's... easier to...volunteer information... to have my own opinions... The association with punishment is much weaker here." Tony thinks a moment. "Possibly it's because I was being trained to work for... to invent things. I couldn't do that if I was concentrating on being obedient. Obedience kills creativity. You've got to be free to step outside the box in order to come up with anything radically new. So when I'm in my workshop, the compulsion is redirected along more familiar lines."

"Do you want to stay here? We could bring in a bed, anything else you need."

"I... yes. I think it would help. You'll stay with me, won't you?" If he can see Steve, then he'll know it's all right to do things on his own here, because he'll be able to see if Steve isn't pleased with him. "I'll try, but I need you."

"Sure." Steve smiled and touched Tony's hand. It felt a little warmer to him. "I'd like to watch you working."

"Oh! I haven't shown you the best..." Tony turns to face the display alcoves against the wall. "The suits. I wish I could put one on and really show you."

"Why can't you?" Steve walked over to the suits and looked at the red and gold one. "Is something wrong with them?"

"Not them. Me. What if... I don't know...I'm sure he never meant for me to wear a suit again. I don't know what might happen." Tony folds his arms across his chest, holding himself back from the yearning to be Iron Man again. To be strong. To be fast. To be free.

"It might hurt you?"

"Or I might... lose control. Hurt you. Hurt Pepper. I don't know." Tony is still calm, and not afraid. Just very sad. It hurt to lose so many things he'd once taken for granted, pride, self-confidence, independence, and the suits embodied so much of that. It was as if they were the symbols for everything that had been taken away from him.

Steve studied the suits. "Is there a way that you could make a... fail-safe, something to let me take control of the suit if necessary? I mean, it's not just metal and weapons, Pepper told me that it's more like a fighter plane. So if you could rig up an auto-pilot and give me remote control, I could tell it to take over, and stop you from doing anything dangerous."

"That's... you know... that might actually work. I use a copy of Jarvis to organize all the controls and responses, it could be set up to override the suit operator, and default to a 'return to controller' auto-pilot. You wouldn't be able to give the suit any detailed commands, but with Jarvis as the interface interpreter, you wouldn't have to. Plain English would do." Tony is swaying from foot to foot as the excitement builds up in him. He can do this. He can fix it. He can give Steve control and then it will be good, will be safe. "Oh, God, I could fly again. Steve, I could fly." And Tony is crying again, but this time it doesn't hurt.

"Tony." Steve went to him and wrapped his arms tightly around Tony. "I want to see you fly."

***

_Agents Barton and Romanova have arrived._

"Thank you, Jarvis," Tony says. "Save the preliminary modifications to the suit interface control structure. Analyze for any coding conflicts and prepare a report." Tony stands up, leaving all the wireframe holograms of suit subassemblies still active, hovering around the room. He likes being surrounded by them.

_As you wish, sir._

Steve sank a virtual basket, and grinned at the flashing lights and 'ding ding ding'. "You have the best toys, Tony."

"Yes, yes I do." Tony goes to Steve and takes his hand. "You've picked up on the gestural controls of the holos remarkably. I might not have to dumb down the remote too much after all."

Steve laughed. There had been more and more flashes of teasing humor as Tony became involved in the project. Steve thought he would probably fall in love all over again the day that Tony was able to really insult him. "That's good to hear." He put his arm around Tony's shoulders.

 

"Fury wants the suit," Natasha said without preamble the moment Steve and Tony entered the living room. She and Clint were standing there, and Pepper was facing them. 

"That's non-negotiable," Pepper snapped.

Tony turns and hides his face against Steve's chest. He's shaking.

Steve glared at Natasha as he put his arms around Tony. He was furious. For a little while Tony had been doing so well. "What do you think you're doing? You're here to help, not to issue ultimatums. Which aren't going to get you anything. The suits belong to Tony. Fury can't just commandeer them."

Natasha shook her head. "He knows that. Without the power source in Stark's chest, the suits are nothing more than oversized paperweights."

Pepper pushed in between them. "Then what was that all about? Mr. Stark invited you here to assist him, not to threaten him."

"It was a test. One Mr. Stark has failed." Natasha looked Pepper in the eyes. "You can't control a press conference. Someone is bound to ask a wrong question, something Mr. Stark isn't prepared to deal with."

"You don't know that!" Pepper said, moving even closer to Natasha. "I am damn good at handling reporters!"

Clint sighed, drawing attention to himself as he sat on the couch. "This isn't going to be fun. Can we not fight among ourselves?"

Reluctantly, Steve nodded. "We don't have time to argue. But you will not pull any more stunts like that without talking it over with me first."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony flies.

"Mr. Stark, how do you account for your absence the last three months?" Clint asked in his role as reporter.

Tony flinches and looks toward Steve, who's standing to one side of the podium set up in the living room. "I... That's not one of the questions on the list. Do I have to answer that?"

Steve shook his head. "No, Tony, but you can't look at me and ask me what to do when you're holding the press conference." Tony looked so deflated that Steve went over to him and gave him a hug. "Let's go to the garage for a cup of coffee." Steve looked at the others. "We could all use a break."

Natasha exchanged a glance with Pepper after Tony and Steve had left the room. "This isn't working, admit it. We'll just be throwing him to the wolves."

"We still have time," Pepper said, with a stubborn look on her face. "Tony's doing better."

"Yeah," Clint said lazily, stretching and leaning back on the couch. "He hasn't cried in two days. Given another month, I'm sure we could whip him into shape." 

"But we don't have another month," Natasha replied. "He can't even read a prepared statement without looking at Steve for approval. One blurted out question that isn't on the memorized list, and it's all over."

Pepper got up. "Tony is a lot stronger than you give him credit for."

"I don't doubt it. But he's not ready for this, and he's not going to be ready unless we can find some way to give him at least a temporary infusion of self-confidence." Natasha stood up. "I'm going to call Fury. Maybe there's something in the pharmaceutical line that would work."

"You're not drugging Mr. Stark."

"Ms. Potts, we're running out of options here." Natasha gathered Clint up with a glance. "You can discuss it with Steve and Mr. Stark. Let us know if you want our continued assistance. Otherwise... there's not much point in our remaining here." Natasha and Clint went out the front door.

***

Tony sits down at his desk, and sighs. "I'm sorry. I know what I should be doing, but I can't... damn Pavlov."

Steve brought over a cup of espresso and handed it to Tony. "Maybe instead of fighting your conditioning, we should try to work with it. Just for the press conference, so we can have a breathing space. We can go back to working on erasing it later."

Tony drinks the coffee and considers Steve's words. "How? You can't order me to act like my old self. I'll keep having to check that you approve. CEOs do not seek their bodyguard's approval at press conferences."

Steve stroked Tony's cheek. "You do better in here. Maybe we could hold the press conference in the garage?"

"There's a lot of sensitive material here, proprietary tech... things outsiders shouldn't see." Tony leans into Steve's touch, comforted and calmer. 

"Can't you lock it up? Hide what you can't move?" 

"Mmm.. most of it." Tony closes his eyes as Steve rubs his neck. "But I still would wind up looking at you if they went outside the proposed question list."

Steve kissed Tony's throat. "What if they couldn't see you looking at me?" He guided Tony's head to face the red and gold Iron Man suit.

"That... how...oh. You know... maybe... that might work." Tony opens his eyes and smiles. "The remote override is in place. Can we try it now?"

"Yeah. C'mon, put on the bodysuit. I like you in that."

Tony grins. "You like me out of it even better."

Steve laughed and patted Tony on the ass. "Later."

***

"You've got the override keyed?" Tony bounces a bit from side to side, standing just before the assembly pattern on the floor. The bodysuit brings back memories. Not all good, but they're all of the time before he was broken, so even the bad parts aren't paralyzingly bad.

"Right here." Steve stood in front of Tony, in a space beyond the assembly area. He held up an unobtrusive box. It looked quite a bit like a StarkPhone, with the main difference being the lanyard fastening it around Steve's left wrist. Tony had been afraid he'd drop it if anything went wrong. "We're good. C'mon, Tony. I want to see you fly."

"Yeah, right." Tony takes a deep breath and steps onto the initiation platform. The floor breaks apart, rises, and he steps into Iron Man's boots. He's watching Steve and the delight on Steve's face makes Tony feel so good. He puts up his arms without looking away from Steve and feels the gauntlets slip on and tighten. All around him the armor is moving, encasing him, safe and close, and the whole time Steve is approving, wanting Tony to be strong and safe. Steve isn't afraid of Tony when he's strong. He likes Tony when he's strong. He likes Tony when he isn't strong, too, but sometimes Tony sees that Steve feels guilty about that. Steve shouldn't feel guilty. He protects Tony. He loves Tony. And Tony loves him and wishes he could protect Steve. Tony can't. But Iron Man can. His arms are released and the helmet seals. "Jarvis. I need to know where Steve is at all times."

_Contact will be maintained with Captain Rogers via the override controller._

"Good. Let's start out slow." Tony waits while Jarvis goes through full suit check. He remembers the rush of recklessness. The pure joy of risk. Of not being accountable to anyone. Of not belonging. It's all tangled together. And some of it was good. But not all of it. "Steve? Can I fly?"

"In a minute, Tony." Steve walked forward and put his hands on Iron Man's shoulders. "You're beautiful." Steve had misgivings, but he wouldn't let Tony see them. He had to trust that Tony could handle this. He wasn't going to keep Tony safe in a cage, wasn't going to keep his wings clipped. He patted the cool metal before he stepped back out of the way. "Fly for me, Tony."

"I'll just... go out for a minute." Tony waits until Steve is safely clear before he launches himself. And it's so good. He laughs in pure relief as he leans into the curve, and shoots out of the garage and up into the sky. Jarvis is giving him data, and it's all so easy, pure information and reaction and one corner showing the reassurance of the tiny red light showing Steve's override link. Tony shouts when he sees Steve run out of the garage. He zooms his vision in and sees the wonder on Steve's face. Tony yells and goes up high enough to have room to show off, spinning and looping.

Steve laughed. Tony was a bright, bright red and gold bird, sparkling in the sun, swift and graceful. He tilted his head back and watched Tony fill the sky with joy.

***

When Tony Stark gives a press conference, people expect the unexpected. Pepper hadn't much difficulty getting the chosen half dozen reporters to agree to come to Tony's garage even after she insisted they'd have to stick to the prepared list of questions. Happy and Steve had helped Tony hide nearly all of Tony's 'toys' under the floor, along with the two older Iron Man suits. Natasha and Clint had put on caterer's uniforms and presided over a buffet and wet bar while Pepper circulated and handed out press kits with photos of Tony in a deep violet suit, grinning a cocky smile they'd managed to capture by having Steve making 'rabbit ears' over Clint's head as he took the photos. After half an hour the atmosphere was fairly mellow and only starting to get restless.

Steve stood by the wall that connected to the main house, wearing his bodyguard uniform, and mirrored sunglasses, earbud in place, holster not entirely hidden by his black suit. He didn't say anything to anyone, and concentrated on giving off an air of menace. Pepper nodded at him, and he checked the time on his watch and nodded back, moving smoothly out into the room. "Mr. Stark will be arriving any moment, ladies and gentlemen. Kindly take your seats." He directed the reporters into seats lining the opposite wall and stood close enough to intimidate them into staying put before he used the remote to signal to Tony.

Tony is in the Iron Man suit, sitting on a cliff overlooking the house. He's not quite nervous, but definitely keyed up. Steve wants him to do this. He's good, he can be out of sight of Steve for a little while. Steve knows where he is. He knows where Steve is. Jarvis keeps talking to Tony, showing him images of the garage. Everything's fine. He has his answers memorized. He can do this. Then he gets the signal to come in. His heart speeds up. He can do this. He launches and lets flight calm him. It's only a few seconds before he enters the garage, swooping up and past the startled faces to land as showily as possible on one knee after cutting off the repulsors and then he stands up. He opens the face plate, still grinning from the rush of flight, and sees Steve standing behind the reporters. "It's good to be back! How do you like my new ride?" He spreads his arms wide.

The press conference is loud, and confusing, but Tony stays focused. He answers all the prepared questions about his seclusion to develop his new 'high-tech prosthesis' and jokes with the reporters about buzzing the Santa Monica ferris wheel, and apologizes for going the wrong way down a busy highway while 'working the bugs out'. Pepper passes among the reporters, handing out color glossies of Tony in the Iron Man suit, of him flying, close-ups of him grinning while the face plate is up, and in general convinces them that he'd been working on refining this secret project and was in perfect health, perfectly fine and wonderful.

Tony doesn't break down until five minutes after the last reporter leaves.

***


	5. Chapter 5

Tony is standing in his bodysuit, watching the others clean up the debris from the press conference, when the shaking starts. At first he doesn't realize it, because there's no reason for it. Watching Clint and Dummy wrestle over possession of an empty wine glass is amusing. Pepper talking with Natasha and Happy as they stack chairs certainly isn't upsetting. And Steve directing Jarvis to return the suit to the maintenance stand is familiar after the last few days. Steve always wants the suit in top condition. Tony puts his arms around himself, but the shaking intensifies. He's not frightened. What is there to be frightened about? But his teeth are chattering, and he's so cold. 

"Tony?" Steve looked over and noticed Tony standing with his arms wrapped around himself, looking confused. He went to Tony and touched his cheek. "You're freezing. Come on, let's get you warm."

Tony nods and takes two steps before he stumbles. The shivering has got down to his legs and he can't lock his knees. "I'm sorry." He is acutely aware that everyone is watching him fail yet again.

"Yeah, that's not a problem." Steve picked Tony up and carried him to the Audi. "Let's just sit here for a while, all right?" He got settled in the car and pulled Tony onto his lap to put his arms around him. "You did good. You're just tired." Steve looked past Tony's shoulder at the others. "You take as long as you need."

Tony says, "I'm not frightened. I'm just cold and tired."

"That's good." Steve rubbed Tony's arms. "Would you rather have coffee or go for a rest?"

"Coffee is good. But if I have coffee I can't sleep. I... " Tony's shivers strengthen again. "I don't think I can decide, Steve. I shouldn't have lifted the faceplate. That wasn't the plan. I just thought I could do it, and it would work better."

"You did fine." Steve decided that Tony had simply used up his quota of choices for the day. "I'm going to take you up to bed, and bring you some chicken soup. Tomorrow we'll put the bed back in the garage."

***

Once Tony was fed and sleeping, Steve went back downstairs for what he was thinking of as a post-mission debrief. Pepper looked up from her laptop as he entered the room. "How is he?" she asked. Happy was the only one not there. Steve assumed he was still cleaning up the garage.

Steve ran a hand through his hair and sat on the driftwood table so he could face everyone else. "Better. He's recovering faster each time. Really, it's been less than two weeks since we got him back, I think he's doing great."

Pepper nodded. "It's hard to remember that, seeing him like this, it seems like forever." Pepper sighed. "I used to complain about all the... _Tony_ things he did, but I miss him. I miss the infuriating arrogance, and the certainty that he was right, even when he was so very, very wrong. He never was really comfortable with people. Always said the wrong thing. He got away with it most of the time by being charming or bull-headed according to his mood, but not many people can tolerate Tony for any length of time."

"I like him," Steve said simply. "And not because he can't help wanting to please me." He looked down at his feet and then back up at Pepper, while still aware of Natasha and Clint, silently observing them. "I don't think that what was done to him changed what he is, just forced him to hide. When he can stop hiding, then I'll find out if he likes me. In the meantime, I'm trying not to do anything he'd hate me for. I don't know whether I've crossed that line already. I hope not." 

Natasha shifted, drawing Steve's attention. "We're still on the clock. The time frame's been expanded, that's all. Fury's patience..." Clint made a soft noise of derision. Natasha looked at him and he went back to waxing his bowstring. "Fury wants you to commit to the Avengers."

"Or?"

"There isn't any 'or'. Director Fury agrees that Iron Man would be an asset, if he could be relied on. At present, he can't. But I am empowered to offer a trial arrangement. Mr. Stark provides a location in New York City for the team, and we train there. You work with him when you're not training with us. When we go on missions, Stark stays behind. That's the deal."

Steve frowned. "Tony isn't capable of making decisions. I know he offered to do this, but that was at the beginning, when he would have said anything."

Clint said, "So, you decide for him, and settle it later. If there is a later."

Pepper spoke up, "I've already begun transferring equipment and furnishings and arranging for service staff at the New York mansion. Tony can't fire me." Pepper grinned. "He doesn't understand my filing system."

Steve nodded slowly. "All right. We'll do this. I'll tell Tony in the morning."

***

Tony nods when Steve tells him. "I like Ray's pizza in New York." He nuzzles Steve's neck. "And, as I've said before, I like anal penetration." 

Steve shook his head. "No, not this time, Tony." Steve rubbed himself against Tony, pinning him to the bed.

Tony moans and arches against Steve. "You always say that. What are you waiting for, our wedding night? Do you need me to wear white?"

Steve laughed and kissed Tony. "Maybe." He won't mention Stane, but he knows Tony thought he loved that monster when he was being raped. Steve isn't going to do that to Tony. "You can take me, if you like." Tony has put on a little weight. Steve is less worried about sex breaking him.

Tony jerks and comes. "Ahh. You have... great timing."

Steve grinned and finished himself off with his hands. "Shower, breakfast, and then we move the bed into the workshop. Pepper says it'll be a week before the mansion is ready for occupancy, so this will give you time to organize whatever you want to bring with us."

"Mmm... bring you." Tony looks up at Steve sleepily. Then his eyes widen. "Oh, wait! I just had a great idea! I can turn one of the Samurai into a flying motorcycle! Wouldn't you like that, Steve?"

"Tony." Steve reached down to brush Tony's hair out of his eyes. "That would be amazing."

"We could fly together." Tony's smile reaches his eyes. "Of course, you couldn't keep up with me."

"I don't think anyone can keep up with you, Tony." Steve gives Tony one last kiss, just because he couldn't resist that smile.

***


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony + Steve + ass-kicking flying motorcycle = a bit of fun for them before the next chapter.

"Jarvis, let me see the latest results on the auto-balance system." Tony gulps a mouthful of coffee and concentrates on the monitors. Steve is in the exercise room, lifting weights; the image a small, reassuring fixed point on the bottom left of the monitor. So long as he can see Steve, being apart from him isn't bad, not bad at all. And he's building this for Steve. It's his own idea, but it's for Steve, so it's very good, it's him being better, and it's something Steve will like. Tony's stomach is relaxed. It's all good. He can eat and sleep, and while he really wishes Steve would fuck him, Steve touches him often and lets Tony touch him back, so that's good. He's thinking, and creating and Pepper has made the board of directors happy with all sorts of vague promises. Everything's good. "Oh, I think that's done it. Let's see the final version." The image of a Samurai motorcycle rotates, parts vanish, new parts appear and rotate to lock in place. "Full motion series." Vanes flash out near the front like the 'wings' on a flying lizard, repulsor blasts shoot from the frame below, the wheels rotate to a horizontal aspect and more repulsors glow from the hubs of the wheels. "Nice. Very nice. Red and gold won't do, though. Wrap it in the flag, will you, Jarvis?"

_As you wish, sir._

The motorcycle turns blue, with red and white stripes along the 'wings' and white stars on the sides where a gas tank normally is. As Tony has replaced the power source with an arc reactor, that space is now filled with weaponry. Steve isn't going into battle with nothing except a shield. Not if Tony can help it. The headlights are repulsors as well. This motorcycle will be able to kick some serious ass. Tony smiles at the image. "I like it. Fabricate and paint it."

***

With Pepper gone to New York to check up on the mansion, and Natasha and Clint gone to Fury for last minute instructions, the house was so quiet Steve could hear himself breathe as he went through his routine. He looked up as Tony came into the room. "Well, you look pleased with yourself." Steve smiled as he sat up on the bench and put his towel around his neck. Tony was wearing a faded t-shirt, glowing blue over his reactor, and ripped dark jeans that might once have been black. His hair was standing in random grease-streaked tufts and he had greasy hand prints on his shirt and jeans. Steve felt very much like kissing him.

"It's done." Tony grins and bounces from foot to foot. "It's awesome. Do you want to try it out? Oh, I made you a new suit, too. Wind resistant, pressurized, just a bit...a proper full protection helmet ... you know how you can tell a happy motorcyclist?"

Steve laughed. He hadn't ever seen Tony this relaxed and happy. Going along with an old joke was no hardship to maintain that look on Tony's face. "No, I don't know. Why don't you tell me, Tony?" Steve scrubbed at his sweaty chest with the towel, which made Tony go silent for a moment, his eyes following the motion.

"Um... oh! You count the bugs in his teeth." Tony reaches out to grab Steve's arm. "Come on. Have a shower and suit up. We can race!"

***

The motorcycle was, not surprisingly, incredibly flashy. The uniform was, not surprisingly, very tightly fitted as Steve found when he took his place on the saddle and moved his hands to check the comfort of the angles of the handlebars. Steve would have been embarrassed, but after Tony got through pointing out the armor and the armament, Steve wouldn't have minded if the decoration was neon green with purple zig-zags. No, that's not true, he would have minded that. While a flying motorcycle couldn't be unobtrusive, there was no need for it to be in bad taste. "So, it can take off vertically from a stand-still?" 

"Yes, that's the VTOL there." Tony leans in really much closer than necessary to point out the control. "You can hit that while you're moving, too. You'll just take off a _lot_ faster and going in the same direction." Tony's hands are moving quickly, touching lightly, almost caressing the motorcycle. "After you achieve lift-off the rest of the conversion is automatic- once it registers enough side clearance the vanes will extrude to give you more lateral stability and maneuverability. The wheels will rotate to horizontal, adding their lift. The helmet has a heads up display, which you can disable if you find it distracting, but I'd recommend getting used to it. Having eyes in the back of your head can be very useful in a battle situation. I've uploaded a Jarvis to assist you. He won't let you crash, at least. You've got front and rear mounted RTs- repulsors- you can use them like, well, you'll find out, and an assortment of small arms, missiles, various explosives... and a Swiss army knife just in case." Tony finally stops talking and leans back a little to look up into Steve's face. "I know I'm a little early, but...Happy Birthday?"

Steve laughed and leaned over to pull Tony close for a kiss. "Thank you."

Tony feels so good. "Rhodey got permission for us to use an Air Force test range. We can go blow up shit! It'll be amazing!"

***

"Dear God," Steve whispered to himself in shock as he looked at the crater he'd just blown where a full size tank had been. It was probably only a mocked up shell, but still... He landed the motorcycle and waited for Tony to join him. The motorcycle purred softly and clicked as it folded itself neatly away. Steve took off his helmet and cradled it under one arm.

Tony lands in one knee down pose as usual. He lifts his face-plate and looks at Steve with a worried expression.

To give himself time to get his emotions under control, to be sure he said the right thing, Steve asked, "Why do you do that? I mean, land on one knee?"

"Weight distribution. When I'm unsure of the structural integrity of the landing surface. The first time I shut down the suit I was standing a few inches above my roof. The builder skimped on reinforcing rods," Tony answers thoroughly, trying to please. He's not sure why Steve doesn't look happy. The motorcycle worked fine. Steve handled it as if he was born to it. They blew up lots of shit, spectacularly. A fun day, in Tony's view.

"Oh, ok, that makes sense." Steve ran a hand through his hair. Tony was still looking at him anxiously. "Look, Tony, this is... it's just... too much. What if... you know, Fury would try to take this, and I'm not sure I could stop him. I know you don't want your stuff out of your control, where it might be abused."

Tony relaxes. "Oh, no, the American Samurai is _yours_. That reactor is single response isomorphic." Tony sees that Steve isn't reassured. "It recognizes _you_ as its master. No one else will be able to use it to power _anything_. It's hot-wire proof." Tony starts a detailed explanation, but sees that Steve believes him. That feels good. He can't remember the last time anyone really believed in him. Maybe Yinsen. And look how that had turned out. But Tony is much more careful with Steve. The plan will never be for anything to happen to Steve. Never.

"Oh, good." Steve smiled. "Let's go blow up more 'shit'." He put the helmet back on, and watched as Iron Man took off.

***


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief workout, a bit of cuddling.

The Stark mansion in New York City was roughly the size and layout of an art museum Steve had visited before the war. Of course the museum hadn't had an invisible English butler complaining about arrow holes in the rococo ceiling or a workroom in the basement with disturbingly huge power cables embossed on the walls.

It also hadn't had a number of luxuriously appointed bedrooms. And it certainly hadn't had the very large antique bed Steve was currently sharing with a very rumpled billionaire cuddling against Steve's chest. Tony had been quite honest about enjoying sex. Frequently. Noisily. And sometimes while giggling and falling off the bed. Steve stroked Tony's back idly. He really should be getting up and getting on with the day. Showering, breakfast, physical training, catching up on news of the world, which seemed to change much faster than before he fell out of time. 

But, on the other hand, Tony was here, relaxed and warm and if Steve got up, Tony would get up. Sometimes Steve felt like the guy, who was it? a Chinese emperor, or maybe it was the prophet Muhammad?, who cut off his sleeve rather than disturb the cat sleeping on it. Not that Tony was a cat. Or his pet. Much. Steve had never had a pet, or a lover, and it was rather strange that Tony was, at the moment, rather like both. Steve was uncomfortable with thoughts like those, but sometimes he had them. If Tony never entirely lost his dependence on Steve, would Steve ever feel right about it? Natasha had mentioned domination/submission, but he didn't want to read up on it, to study it or listen to her explanation of psychology and all that. That's not what being a lover was all about. He wanted to be what Tony needed because he loved Tony not because some website told him a set of rules to fit in with some ideal relationship. Tony fairly obviously had always needed someone to take charge of him, make him feel loved, make him feel that he _deserved_ to be loved, make him stop hurting himself, stop hating himself. Steve would be happy to do that for the rest of his life, if only he was sure it wasn't just him taking Stane's place, with Tony being grateful because Steve was a _kind_ master.

Tony shifts and licks Steve's chest. "You're thinking again. I can always tell. You taste different," Tony says sleepily and then yawns.

Steve laughed and ran his hand through Tony's hair. "You can't taste thinking."

"Yes, I can." Tony samples a nipple and continues licking. "Like... mmm... potato chips. The good kind. Handmade. By a select staff. Who love their work."

Well, as long as Tony was already awake... Steve rolled them over, coming to rest on top of Tony, the reactor smooth and cool against the damp patches Tony's tongue had left on his chest. "You can't have potato chips for breakfast."

"What else is on the menu? Something more than rolls and coffee, I hope." Tony puts his arms around Steve's waist. "A continental breakfast never fills me up."

Steve leaned close to whisper in Tony's ear. "How about something all-American?"

"I love when you get patriotic."

***

After three weeks in the mansion, things had settled into a routine. After breakfast, Steve and the others went to the training room. Each of them had a workout designed to hone their particular skills, but they always finished with a three way brawl between Steve, Natasha and Clint. It was fun, and a good way to learn each others' style. So far no one had broken any bones.

Tony had put on more weight, and built up enough muscle definition that Steve no longer thought of him as delicate. When Tony finished the last of his weight work and looked towards the lift leading to the Iron Man suit, Steve called him over instead of turning to spar with Clint and Natasha. "You can fly later, Tony. Come on, hit me." Steve curled his fingers in a 'come and get me' gesture. When Tony hesitated, Steve said, "You can't be on the team if you can't take care of yourself out of the suit."

"Why not? It's not as if I could actually take you mano a mano." Tony doesn't like the idea of hitting Steve. He knows that Steve can take a lot more than Tony could do, unless he was to fight dirty, which... never against Steve. Natasha, yeah, if Tony had to fight her, he'd go as dirty as possible. And wind up eating floor mat. Honestly, without the suit he isn't a match for any of them, but most especially not Captain America.

"You don't have to take me. You just have to give it your best shot. Don't hold back." When Tony still didn't move, Steve shook his head and looked tired. "All right. Never mind, Tony. I guess it's too soon."

Tony has disappointed Steve. He feels cold and sick, but his voice is still steady and he can meet Steve's eyes. "I could fight Clint. Or Natasha. Fighting you won't prove anything, because I would never have a reason to fight you."

Steve frowned. He didn't really like the idea of Clint or Natasha putting their hands on Tony. Which was ridiculous. They were a team. It's not as if they were going to really hurt him. Steve realized he had to work on getting his own protective instincts under control. "All right. We'll work in pairs. You and Natasha against me and Clint."

Tony grins. "Wait! Let me talk this over with Natasha. Lay our battle plans, that sort of thing."

Five minutes later, Steve and Clint were pinned, with Tony and Natasha, respectively, on top and kissing them. Steve decided to count it as a team-bonding exercise.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avengers go recruiting.

Two weeks later Fury called. "I have a line on a possible recruit for the Avengers."

"That's great, sir," Steve said, speaking for the team. They were all gathered around a large monitor in the living room. Steve just happened to be sitting next to Tony with his arm over Tony's shoulders. He tended to do that a lot when Fury called, but then he tended to do that a lot anyway. It wasn't as if he was sending Fury a message.

"Maybe, and maybe not." The monitor split, showing Fury on one side, and someone very large, and very green, smashing through a building and then leaping into the air, on the other. 

"Wow," Clint said, "I didn't know frogs came that size."

Steve lifted an eyebrow and Clint subsided. Steve asked, "Do you want us to go talk with him?"

Tony gives Steve a look. "I may be mistaken, but that didn't look like the kind of person you politely invite to join the country club."

Steve patted Tony on the arm. "It can't hurt to ask."

Fury said, "Unfortunately, Mr. Stark has a point."

Tony silently mouths, "I do?"

"Apparently our large green friend operates on an animalistic level. His alter ego is Dr. Bruce Banner, a respected physicist, but when he transforms his intellect and emotional control drop drastically." The monitor showed two images, a man labeled Dr. Banner, and a woman labeled Betty Ross. "His colleague, Dr. Ross, appears to have some influence over him. Working through her might give you an in."

Natasha leaned forward. "Do we strike up an acquaintance with Dr. Ross, gain her trust first?"

"There isn't time for that." Fury turned his head, apparently looking at something out of their view. "The army has forced the issue. They're trying to take the Hulk by force. That... does not bode well."

Steve leaned forward, all his muscles gone tense with the promise of action, at last. "Are we to assist the army to capture this Hulk, sir?"

"If necessary. I would prefer it if the Avengers were to take sole custody. The army seems to have got off on the wrong foot with him and I'm expecting you to do better. Use charm. To that end, you have my permission to gag Agent Barton. A helicopter will arrive in a few minutes to take you to the location."

"Yes, sir, we'll be ready." Steve stood up as the monitor went blank. "Clint, Natasha, gear up." He didn't wait for them to leave the room before he turned to Tony. "You're staying here."

"What? Hey, no, please. You can't go and leave me here." Tony doesn't like this idea at all. "What if... I won't even _know_ if something happens to you. Any of you." Tony admits to himself that he harbors a sneaking fondness for Natasha and Clint, when they're not terrorizing or teasing him.

"You can watch us with the surveillance devices you've put in our uniforms."

Tony opens his mouth and then shuts it before asking, "What surveillance devices?"

Steve shook his head. "This is an order. You stay here, in the mansion, Tony." Lately, Tony had been _interpreting_ Steve's words to suit himself. Steve had been encouraging it, but this wasn't like ordering pizza toppings. He pulled Tony close for a brief kiss. "Stay here, and stay safe." Then Steve ran to get ready.

***

Tony starts out watching on the main monitor in the living room. Steve and the others are in the helicopter, one of the specials Stark Industries had turned over to SHIELD recently. It's fast, but not meant for combat, or cargo, so Steve doesn't have the American Samurai with him. Tony doesn't like this, doesn't like any of this. He gets up and paces restlessly, watching the split screen showing the Hulk trashing the army. The green guy seems in a really bad mood. Oh, there goes a tank... yeah. Definitely a bad mood.

"Jarvis, get the armor prepped. I can _see_ better using the armor's linkages." He heads for the elevator.

_May I remind you of Captain Rogers' orders, sir?_

It takes a few seconds to get down to the armor storage level. It seems longer than that. "Sure, go ahead and remind me, while you're prepping the armor." Tony doesn't bother with the bodysuit hanging up next to the armor assembly point. It's more comfortable than jeans and a t-shirt under the armor, but he's not taking the time to worry about chafing.

_The armor is ready, sir._

"Fine. Great. Let's go." Tony is just looking. That's all. The armor seals around him, and the HUD comes up. Tony now sees the Hulk on two sides of a multi-split screen as the helicopter has got near enough to see him through the windows as well as the piggybacked army footage. Tony also sees Steve through Clint and Natasha's pick-ups, cycling between them, giving him flashes of Steve's back, the shield, his arm as he points to something, his profile, stern and focused behind the mask.

"I could get better reception if I was closer."

_The difference would be negligible, sir._

"I didn't ask you, Jarvis. I know the math. Better is _better_. I'll just... go for a better look. Shut up, Jarvis. I know what I'm doing."

_Yes, sir._

Tony takes off. Just looking, that's all. Steve said no, but... Steve can be angry at him later. That's fine. Tony's going to get a closer look. "Kick it." Tony goes supersonic, not even noticing the rush. He's watching through Clint's and Natasha's viewpoints, seeing the ground, dirt and leaves blowing. The Avengers are out of the helicopter. They're surrounded by soldiers, and Steve is apparently swaying them by force of patriotic will power, and maybe by flexing his abs, hard to tell without the sound. The Hulk looks even more pissed off...oh, good God, they're using sonics. Tony remembers how that felt. He's sick inside. It's not paralyzing the Hulk completely but he's obviously in a lot of pain.

Tony remembers. He remembers. It hurt, and it made him helpless, and he had raged and raged. If he could have... God...yes, he'd have killed Obie and the sick feeling in his stomach now isn't because he's thinking bad thoughts about Obie, it's because he knows how the Hulk feels. Obie had said he'd kill Pepper. Tony'd been helpless to do anything and that was as bad, in a different way, as having his heart ripped out. Tony had been so damn glad when Obie returned to take him because it had meant that Pepper would be safe.

If Tony had the power of the Hulk, he would have killed anything, anyone, between him and Pepper. And oh, shit. Tony's close enough now, he sees that they are holding Dr. Ross. She's trying to get to the Hulk. The Hulk sees her. Those army fucks are going to get a lot of people killed. And fuck. Steve is there, looking torn between protecting the citizens from the savage green beast, and stopping the torment of the said green beast. Tony is close enough now to zoom in on Steve's face and see when the light of justice, fair play, honor, chivalry and all that stuff overtakes what few scraps of common sense Steve has, and he is giving orders even as he throws his shield at one of the sonic cannons. Clint fires explosive arrows at another, and Natasha takes down the soldiers holding Dr. Ross.

Fuck, this is not going to be good. The Hulk smashes what's left of the cannons, flings a particularly suicidal soldier against a tree, and charges. Toward Dr. Ross. But Steve is between him and the woman. Clint and Natasha are between the Hulk and the woman. 

"NO!" Tony lands in front of the Hulk and uses the full power of the repulsors, channeled through the chest RT, to drive the beast back a few steps. Then he jets over to snatch Dr. Ross, tuck her under one arm and fly her past the Hulk's face, slow enough to let him get a clear view. "Sorry about this!" Tony shouts, a blanket apology to everyone, but most of all to Steve, who looks really, really, really angry at Tony. "Have to dash. Left the kettle on. Come on, big guy, follow the leader!" Tony takes off, trying to be fast enough to avoid the Hulk's leap and grab, while going slow enough not to hurt Dr. Ross, who is clinging to him, wide-eyed, but thank God, seems not to be panicking.

"Any suggestions... how I can get us out of this, and avoid hurting your boyfriend?" Tony dodges a big green fist. "I'd really like not to be hurt, either."

She shouted against the wind, "Put me down!"

"Yeah, I would, but..." And then the Hulk gets Tony's left ankle and he's thrown off balance. "YIKES!" Tony flails, the Hulk growls, Dr. Ross is shouting, and it's all Tony can do to turn the crash into a semi-controlled landing, with Dr. Ross protected from the worst of it. There's a long moment of dizziness, noise and a fair amount of pain.

And then Tony's lying on his back on some rocks big enough to be apparent through the armor, which isn't responding to him. "Oh, this isn't good." A huge green foot is on his chest. A huge green face is snarling at him. Somewhere along the line his helmet's been ripped off. His ears hurt and his head is ringing. None of the repulsors are working. About the only bright spot is that Dr. Ross is clinging to the Hulk's raised arm and trying to convince him not to recycle Tony inside his tin can. This stalemate goes on for a minute or two, and then Tony recognizes the roar of an army jeep being unmercifully pushed to its limits. Tony blinks as the jeep _flies over a boulder_ and Steve leaps out of it just before it smashes into another boulder.

"TONY!" Steve punched the Hulk in the back of the knee and yanked Tony loose, dragging him, armor and all, behind Steve. Steve settled into a crouch in front of Tony, holding his shield defensively before him and glaring at the Hulk.

The Hulk looked confused. He glanced at Dr. Ross. Then he looked at Tony. Dr. Ross tugged at his arm. "Bruce. Please. You don't want to hurt them. You don't want to hurt anyone." The Hulk's forehead wrinkled up. He growled at Steve, but didn't move toward him.

"Stay where you are," Steve said. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Good plan," Tony says, before he thinks that he ought to keep his mouth shut. "Let's avoid the hurting, all around."

Steve said, without looking behind him, "Tony, shut up. I'm mad at you."

The Hulk looked even more confused. Dr. Ross pulled at his hand. "Let's sit down under that tree, Bruce. In the shade." Grumbling, the Hulk went with her.

Steve looked at Tony. He said, angrily, "I gave you a direct order."

Tony looks down at the feet of the Iron Man suit. The left ankle's pretty much a total loss, and the foot inside of it isn't exactly feeling one hundred percent. "Um... yes... well..." The Hulk seems to be shrinking and turning pinkish, which is nice. Tony feels he has enough to worry about with Steve being angry at him.

Steve knelt at Tony's side. "I gave you a direct order." This time he sounded thoughtful.

"It was a stupid order." Tony looks hopefully at Steve. "Really, you needed Iron Man. And look! Happy ending! None of us got squashed! Well, not seriously."

Steve shook his head and reached for his communicator. "Natasha? Get Clint and the helicopter at my coordinates. Tony and I have got Dr. Banner and Dr. Ross. We'd like to leave before the army arrives."

"So," Tony says, "I was thinking, we need our own transport. That helicopter is pathetic. How about I make us a helijet? We'll need something bigger to carry the Hulk around with us." He smiles at Steve.

Steve sighed and leaned down to kiss Tony. "He hasn't agreed to join us."

"You ask him. No one says no to Captain America." Tony feels good. Except for his ankle. And his shoulders. And his ass. But he has Captain America to kiss it and make it better.

***


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avengers visit the Land of Enchantment.

"We need to talk," Steve said firmly a few hours after their return to the mansion. Clint and Natasha had gone out on the mansion's outdoor court to play cutthroat tennis (Steve was fairly sure the rules didn't normally include projectile weapons) and Dr. Banner and Dr. Ross had accepted Nick Fury's invitation for a tour of SHIELD's facilities, with heavy emphasis on the fact that they had priority on personnel, and the army couldn't commandeer any of SHIELD's agents, operatives, or associates. It was a perfect time to pin Tony down for some honest answers. Not that Tony ever lied to him, but he tended to sidestep issues he didn't want to discuss. Steve had let that go for a long time but no longer.

Tony looks up from the pile of disassembled armor that he's sorting into 'looks good, test', 'needs repairs' and 'junk'. "Um... yes? I'm... a little... just a little... busy right now."

Steve looked at Tony. "You shouldn't be. The doctor prescribed bed rest for your lumbar strain."

"I did! I was in bed for two hours, alone! It was weird." Tony is trying to distract Steve. He can see that Steve has his 'thinking' face on, which usually results in discussions about feelings, and no, Tony has never, ever, been good with that.

"We are going to talk."

Tony puts down the gauntlet he's holding. "Yes, Steve." It's not as if he wants to disappoint Steve, but really, Tony is very, very bad at this, and he hates doing things badly. Especially things with the potential for hurting the people he loves.

"Tell me why you disobeyed me," Steve said softly. He reached out to touch Tony on the shoulder. "I'm not angry with you. I just need to know why. What were you thinking?"

Tony looks down at his hands and swallows hard. "I... I was watching. I thought I could just watch, but Jarvis fed me data on the Hulk's abilities while I was watching. He could jump so high and fast, it would take a flier to catch him. He could easily hit hard enough to kill any normal human not in armor." Tony glances at Steve. "You didn't even have the Samurai. Logistically speaking, you and Clint and Natasha were insufficient for the operation, without a ridiculous amount of luck. I don't believe in luck. _Maybe_ you'd be able to add that last fraction of effort to the army's plan, and capture him. _Maybe_ you'd be able to get Dr. Ross to convince him to surrender. But it was far more likely you'd fail, without Iron Man. So... I followed you. I wouldn't have intervened, but... it just was going down badly. The sonic cannon... it drove him totally insane." Tony swallows again. "I'm sure that all he was aware of beyond his own pain was that Dr. Ross was in danger. The Hulk was either going to die trying to get to her, or he was going to kill anyone who got in his way. I ran the scenarios. The only one that stood any chance of success was getting the Hulk to follow Dr. Ross away from the conflict, to give her a chance to calm him. So I took the chance. There wasn't time to explain. There was only time to do it." Tony's hands are shaking. He didn't want to disobey Steve, but it had been necessary.

Steve wrapped his arms around Tony, pulling him close to his chest. "That's what I needed to know. Tony, you made a decision on your own. You said 'no' to me."

"Yes?" Tony is confused a moment, and then he remembers. "Wait! You said you'd fuck me when I could say no! I'm saying no! No, Steve, no!"

Steve laughed. "Yeah, but no. Your back is messed up."

Tony buries his face against Steve's chest. "NOooooooo."

***

Tony hacks into SHIELD's systems on a daily basis as a matter of pride; they think they can keep him out? Hah. Also he likes to see Fury's eye twitch when the Avengers know what's going down before he tells them. If they waited for Fury to tell them things, they'd all be old, gray Avengers. He seldom finds anything actually _fun_ , though. Not like this. He calls Bruce to come from the other lab, and then yells, "STEEEVE! Steeeve! Come look at this!"

"What? Tony, if you're looking at the SHIELD shower room again, I will be very disappointed in you."

"No, no, this is even better! Coulson has found my Christmas present! Look, I want that!"

Steve looked over Tony's shoulder at the monitor showing a huge, metal... robot? shooting some sort of heat rays, blaster, whatever, and wrecking things while people scrambled out of the way. "If you want something destructive around the house, I'll buy you a puppy. What is that?"

"No idea!" Tony is gleefully intercepting copies of all the data Coulson's myrmidons are sending SHIELD. "It's in New Mexico! Land of Enchantment! Can we try out the new jet?"

Steve frowned. "We don't have orders."

"Initiative, Steve! It's called initiative!" Tony is practically bouncing in his seat. Bruce comes into the room and looks at the monitor. "Eric Selvig! Whatever he's into, it's bound to be interesting."

"I'll call Director Fury." Steve hit the speed-dial on his cell.

"It's not as much fun if Dad says we can go to the dance." Tony sighs. "I like sneaking out of the house."

Steve ignored Tony as he talked with Fury."Yes, sir, I've seen what's happening in New Mexico. The Avengers might be of use in that situation. Yes, sir, I know some of us are still on medical leave after recruiting Doctor Banner." Steve looked at Tony. "But Mr. Stark is probably better qualified than anyone else to identify whatever that thing is, and tell us what its vulnerabilities are." 

Tony nods vigorously.

"Yes, sir. We'll report as soon as we arrive." Steve shut his phone and looked sternly at Tony. "You can wear the armor, but no heavy lifting."

"But... the armor does all the work..." Tony looks at Steve and sighs. "Yes, Mother."

***

"We need a faster jet," Tony says sulkily when the big blond guy with the red cape and sledgehammer takes out the metal whatever it was. He has plenty of attention to spare for the monitor feeding from New Mexico as Natasha is flying the jet, even though it's _Tony's_ helijet. Just because she got into the pilot's seat first when he stopped to admire Steve's ass in his nice new, shiny Captain America uniform, she took over. But really, it's not worth arguing with Natasha over anything she wants to do, that way lies a world of pain. "That thing was so cool, and I didn't get to take it apart! Did you see when it got speared, the way it just...reassembled itself facing the other direction? It had to have been cohesive energy fields- the metal was just... boundaries... and the weaponry was just released energy. Really, that's just...so simple, it's brilliant. And it's all gone."

Bruce had his own laptop and was making notes, without paying much attention to Tony. Bruce tended to treat Tony like a white-noise generator, covering up things that really could be upsetting.

Clint said, "Maybe there's a few bits left. You could get a souvenir for a paperweight."

Tony cheers up. "Might be able to get an energy signature off the metal."

"Just don't let Director Fury see you picking up evidence. You know he doesn't like that." Steve tapped at the screen Tony was studying. "Is everything over?"

"No. There's something else going on. The guy with the hammer, Thor? You're kidding me... well, Thor, according to Coulson... he's going after whoever sent the energy robot, and taking the other costume party refugees with him." 

Steve cleared his throat and looked pointedly at Tony, sitting in his armor tapping away right-handed at a laptop and drinking from a Stark-logoed mug of coffee held in his left hand.

"What?" Tony looks up at Steve and then back at the monitor. "Oh. Now, that's interesting... they're planning to hitch a ride on an Einstein-Rosen Bridge. If Kerr's solution is valid, the star forming the black hole is rotating, and collapses into a ring, rather than a point, so that gravity and spacetime curvature are large but finite, and it is therefore _possible_ to travel to the mirror universe without being crushed. Huh. Oh, I wanna go."

"We'll see," Steve said, trying for a firm, no-nonsense tone.

***

"Oh, come on," Tony says. "I don't care if you people are from Asgard or Mordor or Cloud Cuckoo Land, if you can survive the Einstein-Rosen Bridge, we can. You're basically human, right?"

Thor grinned and put Mjollnir on the ground. "We are far more than mortal, Iron Man. If any one of you can lift Mjollnir, I will permit you passage on Bifrost."

"Fine." Tony leans over, still in the armor, and looks at the hammer. He's pretty sure there's some trick to getting the technology to work for you. Maybe to do with the symbols etched on it? He tries pressing and prodding, but nothing depresses or twists, so finally he tries just picking the thing up. It doesn't work. He steps back, scowling. "Bruce?"

"No," Bruce said, while eying the hammer. "If it worked, you'd have an angry, _armed_ Hulk. I really don't think that's a good idea."

"Yeah, no. And I don't guess Natasha wants to risk her manicure..."

Natasha rolled her eyes, went over to the hammer and gave it one futile tug. 

"It's not my style," Clint said, but he had a go at it.

"Steve? Come on." Tony looks expectantly at Steve. He likes watching Steve flex his muscles.

Steve sighed. "Honestly, guys, this is silly. If Thor says no one but him can lift it, then I believe him."

Tony pouts in Steve's direction.

"All right, all right." Steve walked over to the hammer, reached down, and... picked it up. "Oh. That wasn't supposed to happen, was it?"

***

"You said you'd let us use the Bridge!" 

"Indeed, and I will keep my word," Thor said. He kept looking at his hammer and then at Steve. "Captain America is undoubtedly a worthy man. _He_ may accompany us."

Steve moved in close with the Asgardians. "Someone's got to take care of the Earth while I'm gone."

The Bridge formed and flashed down. "Natasha, you're in charge!" Tony fires his boot jets and leaps into the stream with them.

***

"Tony!" Steve snapped, but then he was distracted by the really big guy folded over a sword stuck into... something... and everything else was really... Asgard.

"Take him to a healing room," Thor ordered. "Leave my brother to me!" And he whirled his hammer and flew away along the rainbow bridge. Sif and the Warriors Three carried Heimdall out, leaving Tony and Steve in Odin's observatory.

"We're not in Kansas any more, Toto," Tony says, as he looks around. "Hey, while no one's around, let's look under the hood."

"Maybe we shouldn't, Tony."

"Just a look!" Tony slides under the central pillar, looking up at the sword impaling it. "This is... oh, neat. I suppose it's a sword, too, but it's acting to bridge a circuit. Wonder what kind of metal it is?"

"Just look! Don't touch anything!" Steve moved to where he could watch both the Bridge and Tony's back. "If you break it, I don't think even you can buy it."

"Yeah, yeah, right."

"And it's our only way home."

"I promise! I won't even breathe on it!" Tony hums happily as he takes notes and Jarvis records them. A whole new technology! This is just... so cool. And then there's the sound of running footsteps, and Steve shouts and FUCK, that's COLD. Ice flows all around him and the column and he's frozen in place, like a bug in amber.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony's on ice. Steve gets hammered.

"Tony!" Steve started towards the iced-over column, but then he saw a man holding a box glowing blue. In Steve's experience glowing object plus smirking man usually equaled trouble (even when it was Tony, sometimes _especially_ when it was Tony), so he threw his shield at the box. The shield went straight through the man as if he wasn't there and wedged in what looked like a branch made of ice, part of an entire ice tree growing out of the column.

"Mortals in Asgard?" 

Steve whirled at the sound of the mocking voice behind him just in time for a blast of freezing cold to envelope him from the waist down. He struggled, but the ice surrounding him was immovable. The man with the box walked up to Steve, smirking even more. "Thor's standards have fallen." Then he looked at Steve more closely. "Or perhaps not. I had thought my brother was beguiled by that weak woman, but you... now, I could imagine uses for this." He ran a hand down Steve's chest, dodging swiftly when Steve tried to grab him. "I may save you for later, when I have time to see to your... education."

"HEY!" Tony's HUD display can't see very well through the ice, but he can still get a general idea what's going on, and he can certainly hear. Jarvis is still on line. The armor is encased, but not iced up on the control surfaces. If Tony felt like becoming a steamed lobster he could even fire the repulsors. "No feeling up Captain America! I've got dibs! Who the hell are you, anyway?" Tony is pretty sure this is Loki, but megalomaniacs generally get pissy when you don't recognize them, and pissy people tend to concentrate on beating on little pricks like Tony, not on messing up polite people like Captain America.

Loki moved around the pillar, staring through a relatively clear patch of ice, at Tony. "Interesting. So there's a man under that pretty armor. Well, something of a man. You're not very big, are you? I wonder whether you're worth saving as a pet?"

Steve made a noise that could only be described as a growl. Loki grinned. "Maybe the set would be amusing. What would you do for each other, I wonder? What wouldn't you do?"

"I'll tell you what we'll do." Tony's heart nearly jumps in his throat. Loki's casual threats about 'education' and 'pets' brings up far too many memories. He's not going to let that happen to Steve. "We'll destroy you. You think your _magic_ scares us? David Copperfield would have you for breakfast!"

Steve saw the flash of anger in Loki's eyes. "Tony, no!"

Loki ignored Steve, staring down at Tony. "This Copperfield isn't here, just me and my new pets."

"You have a thing for blonds, don't you? Why don't you just go hump Thor's leg? He seems like a generous guy, I bet he'd..."

Loki pulled the glowing box out of nowhere. His skin turned ice-blue and his eyes a hot, reptilian, orange-red. "And I wager that freezing your tongue probably won't kill you."

"LOKI, NO!" Thor arrived, landed with a thud and shouted, "This is madness! What are you doing?"

Loki whirled to face Thor. "I am saving Asgard! You can't stop it! The Bifrost will grow until it utterly destroys Jotunheim."

"You can't destroy an entire race!" protested Thor.

Tony thinks Loki probably can. Jarvis is still feeding him data on the Bifrost mechanism. With the power of a black hole behind you, you can destroy very nearly anything. Tony doesn't know who these Jotunheim people are, but he's never been a fan of genocide. Tony's left gauntlet happened to be aiming at the sword when he was frozen. There's a chance... let's do the math. The HUD shows him Steve is still struggling in the ice. Tony tries to estimate the collateral damage from what he has in mind. Will it extend to Steve? Loki and Thor are still shouting at each other about thrones and sibling rivalry issues, and woah, yeah, Tony's pretty sure he hit the nail on the head, there. Thor may not have noticed, but Loki definitely has the hots for his brother. Unresolved sexual tension is a powerful motivator. Tony vouches for that.

"Thor!" Steve shouted, and he held up his hand. Thor hesitated only an instant, and then he threw Mjolnir to Steve. Loki turned and saw Steve catch it and bring it down on the ice encasing him. The ice shattered and he staggered free, still holding the hammer.

"NO!" Loki screamed in fury. "This mortal cannot wield Mjolnir! It refused to accept _me_!"

Tony can never resist a good opening. "Maybe if you stopped holding your breath and turning blue it'd like you better." A whole lot more ice forms around the column. Tony can't see a thing for the blue-white glow and external sound is cut off, too. Jarvis notes that his reserve air supply seems to be freezing. "So, really, frozen or flash-fried, the choice is mine... can't flip a coin... good bye, Steve." Tony closes his eyes and fires his repulsor at the sword.

***

"Tony, you are an idiot."

Tony opens his eyes. His helmet is off and Steve is looking down at him. There's a lot of chunks of ice scattered around. Off to one side, he hears Loki muttering what are probably Asgardian curses. "You're dripping on me." It's not Tony's snappiest rejoinder, but then he's not usually par-boiled on one side and frost-bitten on the other. That can't be good for your brain. Now that he thinks about it, all the armor and the bodysuit is off, and he's lying naked, half in Steve's warm arms, and half in a frigid puddle. He didn't think Steve was that kinky. Not that he minds, but he doesn't have the energy at the moment to really appreciate it.

"The bridge is gone. We can't get back to Earth."

"Sorry?" Tony doesn't like seeing how wet Steve's face is. "You need a towel."

"You need a keeper."

Tony blinks. "I thought I had one." He's confused. 

"Yeah. Yeah, you do, Tony. He's just... not always very good at it." Steve kissed Tony lightly, careful of the scalded places and frostbitten patches.

"Yes, he is, he's perfect." Tony's eyelids keep shutting on him. It's annoying. He wants to look at Steve. "Just what I always wanted." Tony's eyes refuse to open. He's tired. And Steve's got him, so it's perfectly safe to go to sleep. 

Steve stood up with Tony in his arms and stepped over Loki, who was pinned by Mjolnir resting on his chest. "Thor...."

"Do not be concerned. Nothing has been broken this day that cannot be mended." Thor didn't look at Loki. "I will guide you to a healing chamber."

***

Tony wakes up. At first he thinks he's sitting in the steam room at the Badrutt's Palace Hotel in St. Moritz after taking a header on the slopes. There are the obligatory fluffy towels, the carved wood and polished stones, the attractive attendants... but he's fairly sure no one wears armor in Switzerland. He pulls his fluffy towel a little more comfortably around himself and looks around, waiting for things to slot into place. He's not drunk or hung over. Steve doesn't like him getting drunk... oh. "Steve?" Right. This is Asgard and Tony's broken the way back home. So... presumably Steve is here, somewhere, which is the most important thing.

"Your companion is in the mead hall," one of the very attractive blonde women in armor tells him, pausing in the act of bending over to stoke an enormous fire. Tony keeps his eyes up to her face. Eye contact, that's the ticket. Strangers generally get annoyed when you openly appreciate them, even though you're only admiring the scenery, and Steve gets that disappointed look on his face, which, no.

"Mead hall?" Tony stands up and looks around, hoping for some clothes. Not that being naked is any bar to looking for Steve, but the floor is cold, despite the fire. "Huh. My back doesn't hurt." Neither does his ass, but really, Tony is trying not to flirt, so ass-references are not on the conversational menu.

"This is the healing chamber."

"Oh. I guess that explains it." Not really, but close enough. It's certainly better than a hospital. "Can I borrow some clothes?"

***

Asgard is HUGE. Tony gets lost twice on the way to 'the mead hall', but after that he decides he's not lost, he's exploring. Everyone here is tall and impressive as all hell, but friendly, so he takes the opportunity to nose about anywhere that doesn't have guards at the door. "Oh!" He turns, following the familiar scent of hot metal. Long before he tracks it down, he hears the rhythmic pounding of hammer on... not steel, the ring is purer, almost crystalline. Interesting. He pokes his head in at a prudent angle from the doorway. The forge is primitive, the blacksmith is... awesome. Sparks are flying under the sure strokes against... yeah, ok, sword. Big, kinda familiar sword. Oh, yeah. Tony broke it. Without looking up, or breaking his rhythm, the blacksmith says, "I am Regin, little one."

Tony would be insulted, but... hey, _Steve_ would be small next to Regin. "I'm Tony Stark." Tony stands as straight as he can in his borrowed leather and silk and saunters over closer to the forge, but not too close. "I've done a little iron-work myself."

Regin grunted and pointed to a stand in one corner. The Iron Man armor was assembled on it, repaired and gleaming. "Gold and titanium. Weight was a consideration, I assume. Vibranium is far superior."

"Yeah, but..." Tony edges closer. "Vibranium doesn't grow on trees. At least not on Earth. Captain America's shield is the biggest chunk of it we've got."

Regin quenched the sword in a barrel of silvery oil and took it to a grindstone. "Still, the armor was a good beginning. I could use a new apprentice."

Tony grins and moves even closer, so he can watch the sparks fly as a new edge is put on Heimdall's sword. "I'd love to stay, but Captain America and I have commitments back at home."

"A warrior must remain true to his oath."

"Yeah, but... listen, if you could teach me how to make one thing, I'd really appreciate it."

***

Heimdall shows up to take possession of his repaired sword the moment it's complete and doesn't seemed annoyed with Tony for breaking it, so Tony is pleased about that. Heimdall is not a person Tony wishes to ever be annoyed with him. Tony gets Regin to guide him to the mead hall soon after that.

Tony looks down the length of the hall. The one-eyed guy sitting in the largest chair at the end is probably Odin, if Tony has his legends who turn out to be real people straight. Thor is next to him, laughing. And next to Thor is Tony's favorite blond. Steve looks good, very good. He's laughing, too. Tony walks up to Steve. Steve turns and grins and grabs Tony, pulling him onto his lap to kiss him. "Steve! You missed me!"

"Yes! I did." Steve hugged Tony breathless and then hiccuped.

"STEVE! You're drunk!" Tony is gleeful. "I thought you couldn't get drunk!"

"So did I! It's Asgardian mead! Wonderful stuff!" Steve beamed and tilted a little sideways. "Thor got me hammered!"

Tony laughs. "The sword is repaired. We can open the Bridge and go home."

"WONDERFUL!" Steve kissed Tony again. "Come home and marry me."

"What?"

Steve nuzzled Tony's neck. "It's easier to say things when I'm drunk. Did you know that?"

"I have some experience along those lines. Would you mind repeating what you just asked me?" Tony doesn't think anyone besides Thor has even noticed him and Steve. The Asgardians know how to throw a party.

"Marry me. Please?" 

"No." 

Steve's face crumpled. "No?"

"Ask me again."

Steve frowned in confusion. "Tony Stark. Will you." He paused for another hiccup. "Marry me?"

"On the off-chance you still mean it when you're sober..." Tony fished in his pocket and pulled out a pair of rings, made of Bifrost stuff. The rainbow glitter moved along them as he held them up. "Yes."

Steve kissed Tony. Thor jumped up on the table and whirled Mjolnir overhead. A lot of people made noise. 

When it quiets down enough that Steve can hear him, Tony whispers in his ear, "Fuck me now?"

Steve sighed and shifted in his seat. Then he looked mournfully at Tony. "It's... not working." Then he leaned gracefully over until he was sprawled across the table.

Tony sighs and kisses Steve's cheek. "They say it's better if you wait. I think they're crazy." Tony grabs the nearest mug of mead. "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em."


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have been aiming towards the last three words ever since chapter 5.

"Tony."

"Mmm..." Tony reaches out blindly, and pats along very firm, warm muscles. "Steve. Good."

"Are you awake, Tony?"

Tony shuffles over and presses his forehead against Steve's lovely warm shoulder. They're naked and in a really big bed, Tony's hindbrain tells him after a moment. No one is currently trying to kill them. Neither of them is broken, bleeding, or even bruised. The ambient temperature is well within tolerance limits. And they're in Asgard, which has no cell phones or communications links with either Pepper or Fury. Not that he thinks any of this in words. "Yes?" Part of him is awake, and it's got the deciding vote, since the rest of him is willing to go along without protest. He'll get around to opening his eyes any minute now. "Is there coffee?"

"No." Steve rolled them over, landing on top of Tony to get his attention.

Tony wraps his arms around Steve. "No coffee." He licks Steve's throat. "Steve."

Steve laughed. "Tony. Why did you say no the first time?"

The rest of Tony's brain kicks in with a jolt. He opens his eyes. "Because I wanted you to believe me when I said yes. Do you?"

"Yes." Steve kissed Tony's forehead.

"We're officially engaged."

"Yes." Steve shifted and kissed Tony's cheek.

"We're in a really nice bed."

"Yes." Steve moved a bit over and took Tony's mouth for a swift kiss.

"We're going to..." Tony says as he tries to think of a 1940's euphemism, "go all the way?"

"No." Steve sat up and gave Tony a rueful look. "Our friends will be worried about us." He slapped Tony lightly on the thigh. "It would be irresponsible to keep them waiting."

"We could be quick!"

"Tony, no. I am not going to rush making love to you." Steve got up and began getting dressed. "They brought the Iron Man suit."

Tony sighs and lies there for a moment longer, spreading his arms and legs out to their full extent and mourning the lack of a large, hot body pressing him down into the bedding. "Why aren't you hung over?"

"Clean living." Steve wandered past while adjusting the fit of his Captain America costume.

***

"Jarvis," Tony says as soon as he's suited up. "We're going to get married." He is walking hand in hand with Steve towards the Observatory. Along the way, various gods, goddesses, whatever, smile at them.

_This is rather sudden, sir. I don't know that I'm ready to commit._

"Very funny." Someone in purple armor stops them long enough to put flower garlands over their shoulders. "Aloha," Tony says, which doesn't seem to faze the purple guy. Hey, if you're man enough to wear purple and weave posies, nothing fazes you. It helps if you're eight feet tall.

Steve smiled and said, "Thank you." They resumed walking. 

_New Mexico is neutral on the subject of same-sex marriage, as it is neither prohibited, nor expressly sanctioned. I shall access a[ gay planning site](http://www.engaygedweddings.com/new-mexico-gay-wedding.html) once an internet connection is achievable._

Tony blinks as a slide show of gay wedding pictures begins. "Why do you have that in storage?"

_Contingency planning, sir._ Jarvis sounded smug.

"Oh, God, my A.I. is a yenta."

"Tony," Steve said, "Stop talking to yourself. You'll make a bad impression on the Asgardians."

"I was talking to Jarvis. He's planning a New Mexico wedding for us."

Steve looked thoughtful. "No. We're waiting until we get to New York. All our friends should be there. You will call Pepper and Rhodey."

"They will mock me!"

"No, they won't."

"Pepper always said I didn't have enough commitment to subscribe to the newspaper! And Rhodey, oh, God, he'll throw a bachelor party! And ..."

"Take a deep breath, Tony. Having wedding jitters is normal."

Tony takes a deep breath. "Thank God one of us is calm." Steve squeezes Tony's hand hard enough that he feels it through the armor. 

"You'll do just fine."

***

The Bifrost deposits Iron Man, Captain America, and Thor in the middle of a small crowd. Jane Foster is the first to greet them, if you call a full-body lunge while shouting, "THOR!", a greeting. Thor grabs her and swings her around, laughing, while Tony thinks invisibility thoughts and _Look, a God, Look at HIM!_.

The distraction was insufficient. Along with a host of other semi-interested parties, Coulson and Fury were _both_ there, along with Natasha and Clint, so that was three and a half pairs of eyes that never missed anything. Bruce was there too, of course, and so was his girlfriend Betty, which was not entirely a surprise, as everyone knew she was best at keeping Bruce from going mean and green, and often got dragged along for the ride. Fury looked at the garlands encircling Captain America and Iron Man. Darcy took photos while laughing. 

Tony is torn between hoping they're all blurred, and really, really wanting one good shot to save for his wallet.

Fury's eye glittered as he lowered his head to take in Tony's gauntlet clasped in Steve's red leather glove. His gaze tracked over Thor and Jane, Bruce and Betty, and finally landed on Natasha and Clint, who were standing altogether too close for optimum assassin efficiency. "How the hell did I wind up running a heroes dating service?" He grunted and turned his attention back on Steve.

"You're invited to the wedding, too, sir!" Steve said cheerfully.

"Fine. But I'm not kissing the bride." Fury turned and stalked away.

***

Pepper planned the wedding, after crying and insisting that on behalf of American womanhood, at least they owed her a good photo of them kissing at the altar, and they'd better not cheat her.

Rhodey did in fact give Tony an epic bachelor party. Steve said he didn't mind so it should have been all right, but Tony remembers hiding in the bathroom for most of it. There were far too many handsy people and he maybe finally cried just a little bit into his cell phone and called Steve to come get him. Steve left his own bachelor party that Clint had set up. They went back to the mansion and spent the rest of the night sitting on the couch, eating popcorn and sort of watching movies.

Tony wakes up on the couch to Cary Grant serenading a leopard, with Steve's arms wrapped around him. He's ridiculously happy.

Steve nuzzled his neck. "I was thinking."

"Yes?" Tony lifts his chin for better access.

Steve fitted one big hand around Tony's neck. 

Tony goes completely limp, shutting his eyes and enjoying the feeling of belonging to Steve.

"You've always liked that."

"Yes."

"Would you like a collar?" 

Tony's eyes fly open. Something inside of him goes hot and liquid and his heart is racing. "Yes!"

Steve's fingers stroked back and forth across Tony's neck. "I've been thinking about it for a while. Leather chafes when it gets sweaty. Jewelry might get caught under your armor."

"I could get a tattoo across my collarbone?" Tony realizes he's been thinking about it, too.

"No. I... asked about that, and they said it's often very painful. I don't want pain to be any part of our wedding." Steve's fingers trace lines, soft and delicate. "I thought... I could paint a collar on you. There are semi-permanent inks, harmless." 

Tony swallows hard, feeling the light pressure of Steve's fingers on his throat. "Semi-permanent?"

"I thought..." Steve blushed. "I thought it would be nice. You know. I could touch it up every week. It'd be like renewing our vows."

"Oh." Tony's throat is tight and his eyes are wet. "I'd... like that very much, Steve."

***

It's really a very nice wedding, although the whole day pretty much passes Tony in a blur. Tony's not even sure how they arrive at the church, or who chose it. It's large enough for everyone they want to attend, and the combination of Fury's agents and Rhodey's military buddies standing guard outside keeps the paparazzi out, except for one, who sneaks in, encounters Natasha, and wakes up hours later in the churchyard.

Tony is pretty sure the words, 'love, honor and obey' are in his part of the vows, and 'love, honor, and protect' are in Steve's. 

Thor manages not to lose the ring he holds as Steve's best man. Rhodey makes sure Tony doesn't drop the ring he carries as Tony's best man.

Natasha and Pepper are the best maids of honor ever, Tony thinks. He's not quite sure how Clint wound up as the flower girl, but Natasha seems to have had something to do with that. Bruce isn't in the wedding party. He gets too emotional, and green just would clash terribly with the chosen colors. It's entirely possible that Fury wipes a hanky across his eye at some point in the proceedings.

Steve is wearing his dress uniform, with all his medals in miniature, except the ones that don't have miniatures. The neck chain the Asgardians gave him has what Tony hopes is a sapphire (rather than anything magical, please, no) as big as an egg. It glitters as Steve shifts to take Tony's hand and turn him so the congregation can see them as they kiss.

Tony holds his head high. He makes sure everyone can see his collar. He remembers everything about the collar. He remembers last night, sitting silent and still, naked on a tall stool, letting Steve see all that he is. He remembers Steve accepting Tony, making him Steve's with each feather light touch of the brush against his skin. He remembers Steve's soft whisper as he paints thin blue bands above and below, as he tells him the blue lines are his boundaries, Steve's loving rules. Between the blue bands he knows there are red and white stripes for blood and tears, Steve's promise that he will fight at Tony's side through everything, and in the center there is a blue field filled with white stars. Stars for freedom. Stars for belonging. 

Tony stands next to Steve in the church before everyone. Tony belongs to Steve. 

Tony wears white.


End file.
